


who gave these kids messenger

by sparrellow (tigerange)



Category: Vocaloid
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Chatting & Messaging, Crack, Drama, Everything is Beautiful and Nothing Hurts, F/F, F/M, Humor, Idols, Implied Sexual Content, Multi, Romance, Sexual Humor, Slow To Update, Some Plot, Swearing, and fails, but they still have the same last names because i can, except for rins feelings, it's just crack, len is stupid, miku is a big homosexual, miku tries to be a wingman, rin and len arent FUCKING RELATED
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-02
Updated: 2018-12-05
Packaged: 2019-09-05 11:39:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16809892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tigerange/pseuds/sparrellow
Summary: Miku tries her best and fails miserably at being a good friend.Len is just so, so blissfully unaware.Rin has a secret, and (surprise!) it's not a crush on someone.Gumi wants to know why she's been added to the chat.Meiko is drunk, but is still more responsible than everyone.Kaito has a [redacted] and probably will get [redacted].Luka wishes she could get a fucking break....And it all goes down in chat.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> "Wow, this is the best fanfic I've read in my life!" - someone, Crypton Future Media  
> 「ミク死ね。」 - (maybe) Yamaha  
> "weird flex, but okay." - angry person from tumblr  
> "I'm salty because this story is better than my lyrics but they don't have any music therefore they're bad (insert edgy guitar riff here)." - A Salty Producer, SaltyP, (Salty Producer P)
> 
> (Obligatory this was a mistake, I don't know what I'm doing, but I'm still posting this on ao3 anyway speech.)
> 
> Also:  
> mike wazowski - Miku  
> len/shithead - Len  
> rinnie - Rin

******The Three Musketeers™**

_ 01:09 _

_ mike wazowski: _

hey len, could u pls pls tell me what answers u got for stat quiz

_ len: _

miku, you’ve had two weeks to do the quiz.

_ mike wazowski: _

len, pls

_ len: _

miku, “pls” 

_ rinnie: _

Why are you guys awake? Don’t you have 8ams ???

Also miku stop trying to leech off len, he isn’t even that smart anyway.

_ len:  _

ouch

_ mike wazowski: _

4s open doors, rin. and sleep is for the weak

btw y r u capitalising ur sentences like luka

and also lecturing me

like luka

_ rinnie: _

Um because of my phone’s autocorrect. And I’m checking my phone before I go to bed, like a normal human being.

_ len: _

normal humans don’t go to bed at 1am tho

_ rinnie: _

They also don’t get only 4 hours sleep before a lecture, but what do you know?

_ len: _

touche

_ rinnie: _

Besides, miku, why don’t you go ask len considering you two live under the same roof?

_ mike wazowski: _

don’t judge me. also i didn’t kno whether len was still awake or not

_ len: _

miku, you saw me ten minutes ago in the kitchen

_ rinnie: _

Ha.

_ mike wazowski: _

when both of u gang up against me like that, its bullyiong

_ len: _

bullyiong

_ mike wazowski: _

BULLYING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_ rinnie:  _

Right. Sure. Remember that time you locked us in the music room storage closet at school? I think that qualifies as bullying.

_ mike wazowski: _

omg rin that was 2 yrs ago. anyway u 2 never told me what happened between u 2 until meiko let u guys out

_ rinnie: _

Yeah, that’s because nothing happened.

_ len: _

miku 

if you come to my room within a minute with your laptop I’ll help you answer the stat quiz

if you don’t I’m going to bed

_ mike wazowski: _

OK IM COMIN

or should i say

cummin  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

_ rinnie: _

Yikes.

_ len: _

don’t make me change my mind.

_ mike wazowski: _

ok ok ok ok ok im comin

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

_ rinnie: _

Ugh okay well have fun you two.

Don’t forget your condoms are in your top bedside drawer, Len.

_ len: _

wow

wait. how do you know that

_ mike wazowski: _

RIN, U KNOW WE’RE PRESERVING LEN’S DICK FOR U!!!!!!!!!

also i wouldnt touch him with a ten foot pole. u know that

_ len: _

what

_ rinnie: _

Goodnight.

_ len: _

??????????

_ 06:28 _

_ mike wazowski: _

EHY THE FUCK AM I ALIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_ len: _

miku I swear to god if you don’t get out of the shower in five minutes I’m going to fucking shit in the sink

_ mike wazowski: _

omg u literally take half an hour to do ur hair shut up poopoohead

_ len: _

…

why are you like this

_ mike wazowski: _

bathroom is free shithead! <3<3<3<3

_ mike wazowski changed len’s nickname to shithead _ .

_ 09:46 _

_ rinnie: _

lol

.

.

**HS Music Club**

_ 12:14 _

_ Meiko: _

Hey guys, anyone free to go drinking this Friday?

_ Kaito: _

I’m sorry I have to babysit my sister’s hamster :(

_ Meiko: _

What?

_ Rin: _

what

lol

I can come meiko

_ Meiko: _

Anyone but you

_ Rin: _

rude!

_ Luka: _

Rin, you’re nineteen.

_ Rin: _

and I can look 20 if I wanted to!

_ Miku: _

rin u don’t look a day past 14, and when u try to look 20 u look like a 14 yr old trying to look 20

_ Rin: _

fuck you

_ Luka: _

No profanities in this chat.

_ Rin Kagamine removed Luka Megurine from the chat. _

_ Rin: _

fuck bitch fuck fuck bitch fuck shit cunt fuck bitch

bobs and vagene

peenie

_ Meiko Sakine added Luka Megurine to the chat. _

_ Luka: _

What did she say?

_ Miku: _

she said ur breath smells like tuna and u probably have thrush.

_ Luka Megurine removed Rin Kagamine from the chat. _

_ Meiko: _

So can you make this Friday, Luka?

_ Luka: _

Of course.

_ Meiko: _

Miku?

_ Miku: _

maybe. i may have a hot date on friday

_ Len: _

and I’m guessing the invite isn’t extended to me either?

_ Meiko: _

Sorry, Len.

_ Miku: _

u and rin can go play at the arcade together

or whatever kids do nowadays

_ Len: _

not fair

also you guys do realise that rin and I have drunk on multiple occasions

_ Meiko: _

We know, but we don’t want you two getting in trouble for being underaged.

_ Len: _

rin has already been caught before.

_ Luka: _

Our point exactly.

_ Len Kagamine added Rin Kagamine to the chat. _

_ Rin: _

FUCK FUCK FUCK BITCH CUNT FUCK SHIT SHIT FUCK CUNT BITCH

_ Luka Megurine removed Rin Kagamine from the chat. _

_ Len: _

oof 

_ Kaito: _

You and rin can come visit me while I’m babysitting? :3

_ Miku: _

ok so like no one is going 2 care i have a date?????!!?!?

_ Seen by Meiko, Luka, Len and Kaito _

_ Miku: _

ok, fuck u guys

_ Luka Megurine removed Miku Hatsune from the chat. _

.

.

**The Three Musketeers™**

_ 13:32 _

_ shithead: _

wait miku you didn’t tell me you had a date

also why am I called shithead?

_ mike wazowski: _

bc UR A SHITHEAD!!!!!

also yes, in fact, i do have a hot date. thnx for acknowledging that

_ shithead: _

unbelievable

_ mike wazowski: _

look len i kno ur jealous bc u n ur homegurl have a non-existent love life

but mayb u could use friday as a chance to change that???

_ shithead: _

what??

_ mike wazowski: _

ugh

take rin 2 the arcade and force her 2 play rhythm games with u

_ shithead: _

what has this got to do with your hot date?

anyhow WHO is the person you’re taking on a date?

_ mike wazowski: _

some cute girl from one of my tutes

_ shithead: _

okay so do we know her?

_ mike wazowski: _

no ofc not. well i sure hope not.

_ shithead: _

what’s her name?

_ mike wazowski: _

gumi.

_ shithead: _

wait... gumi with green hair? and she dresses like a carrot?

_ mike wazowski: _

excuse U she’s inspired by our lord n saviour ranka lee, not carrots

also how tf do u kno her

_ shithead: _

she was in one of my classes last semester

_ mike wazowski: _

ew what the FUCK

_ shithead: _

?????

she’s pretty cute I guess, I have to give you that

_ mike wazowski: _

thnx she’s mine. keep those beady len eyes on ur homegurl

_ shithead: _

I don’t have a homegirl?

_ mike wazowski: _

rin

_ shithead: _

what about her?

_ mike wazowski: _

@Rin Kagamine

_ shithead: _

what?????

miku I don’t have a homegirl. and I’m sure rin would agree with that

_ mike wazowski: _

WHY IS SHE NOT BEING SUMMONED

_ shithead: _

she has work, remember???

_ mike wazowski: _

NO OFC NOT. onlu u have her work schedule memorised

jfc

@Rin Kagamine @Rin Kagamine @Rin Kagamine

_ shithead: _

omg

_ mike wazowski: _

fuck it. can u add me back 2 the squad chat

**HS Music Club**

_ 13:59 _

_ Len Kagamine added Miku Hatsune to the chat _ .

_ Miku Hatsune started a poll: len is stupid. _

_ Miku voted yes. _

_ Len voted no. _

_ Kaito voted no. _

_ Luka voted no. _

_ Meiko voted yes. _

_ Miku: _

oh come on

_ Len: _

where did this come from???

_ Luka: _

Wait. Is this relating to Len’s intellect in general or his intellect regarding the feelings of a certain blonde person who shall not be named?

_ Miku: _

both

_ Luka changed her vote to yes in the poll. _

_ Len: _

why????

.

.

**The Three Musketeers™**

_ 17:03 _

_ rinnie: _

Whoa what did I miss

_ shithead: _

RIN YOU’RE FREE. MIKU HAS BEEN BULLYING ME. PLEASE HELP!!!!!

_ rinnie: _

What

Hatsune miku please stop insulting shithead

_ shithead: _

:(

_ mike wazowski: _

omg

im surrounded by idiots

@Rin Kagamine yes or no

_ rinnie: _

What

No

??

_ mike wazowski: _

fuck

_ shithead: _

YES. THANK YOU RIN, ILY!!!!!

_ rinnie: _

Um. You’re welcome?

**Miku Hatsune**

_ 17:15 _

_ Miku: _

omg he said he loves u…

_ Rin: _

Wtaf is going on

Also shut up

_ Miku: _

u kno exactly what’s going on  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

_ Rin: _

Miku istg I thought we already covered that after five years of everyone trying to get me with len, len just isn’t interested.

_ Miku: _

NO. len is just stupid

_ Rin: _

Unbelievable

_ Miku: _

you sound exactly like him!!!!

**The Three Musketeers™**

_ 17:23 _

_ shithead: _

how was work, rin??

_ rinnie: _

Long and boring.

_ mike wazowski: _

she was missing u

_ rinnie: _

No

_ shithead: _

aw, I missed her too!

without your protection, rin, miku has been taking advantage of me all day

:(

_ rinnie: _

I see that

_ mike wazowski: _

pwotection  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

_ shithead: _

???

_ rinnie: _

Miku, stop.

_ mike wazowski: _

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

_ shithead: _

anyway do you have work on friday rin?

_ rinnie: _

No

_ mike wazowski: _

y r u even asking that when u kno her work schedule by heart

_ shithead: _

miku, shut up.

I wanted to check

do you want to hang out at the arcade this friday?? since everyone else is ditching us for adult luxuries

_ mike wazowski: _

omg how dare u 2 go 2 the arcade and not invite ME

_ shithead: _

YOU HAVE A DATE AND YOU SUGGESTED IT SO SHUT UP MIKU

_ mike wazowski: _

calm down ALL CAPS

**Miku Hatsune**

_ 17:30 _

_ Miku: _

omg the arcade ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

_ Rin: _

Miku please

Wait

You have a date?

_ Miku: _

um yes did u not read chat

_ Rin: _

Wow I can’t believe someone was actually attracted to your personality

I feel so sorry for them

_ Miku: _

fskjhfdjfkdjdshskjdhjfhfsk 

fuck u

**The Three Musketeers™**

_ 17:36 _

_ shithead: _

why isn’t she replying???

_ mike wazowski: _

omg calm down lover boy ur homegurl is prob just screamin into her pillow or smth

_ shithead: _

wait why would she be screaming

_ mike wazowski: _

… lol

_ shithead: _

?????

_ rinnie: _

Sorry I was changing trains. I’m cool to go to the arcade, but which one?

You live in like kanazawa

Sorry *kanagawa

And I live in chiba

_ shithead: _

oh! I was thinking we could meet up at akiba!

_ rinnie: _

I guess that works. What time?

_ shithead: _

maybe 3pm? we could play in the arcade for a while then go get dinner or smth

_ rinnie: _

Okay sounds good. Meet at electric town exit?

_ shithead: _

yes!

_ mike wazowski: _

can’t u 2 plan this in a private chat. my date n i could conveniently show up at the same location  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

_ rinnie: _

K

_ rinnie removed mike wazowski from the chat. _

_ rinnie: _

So where were we

**Miku Hatsune**

_ 17:52 _

_ Miku: _

BITCH ADD ME BACK

_ Rin: _

No. You asked for it.

_ Miku: _

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**The Three Musketeers™**

_ 17:55 _

_ shithead: _

miku is screaming

now she’s in my room

rin

_ rinnie: _

Condoms in top drawer

_ rinnie changed the chat name to The Two Musketeers™. _

_ shithead: _

no!!!!!!!!!!!

miku also says no!!!!!!!!!!

_ shithead added Miku Hatsune to the chat. _

_ rinnie: _

Len, no, how could you have done this?

Betrayal

_ Miku Hatsune changed the chat name to The Three Musketeers™. _

_ Miku Hatsune changed rinnie’s nickname to len’s biggest fan. _

_ Miku: _

ur lucky i dont want to introduce my date 2 u embarrassments

_ len’s biggest fan: _

Fuck You

_ shithead: _

I’m sorry rin

she had me cornered

_ len’s biggest fan: _

I’ll consider forgiving you if you let me win every game at the arcade

_ shithead: _

… thank you

_ Miku Hatsune changed her nickname to len’s an idiot. _

_ shithead: _

hey now

.

.

**HS Music Class**

_ 08:21 _

_ Len Kagamine added Rin Kagamine to the chat. _

_ Rin: _

ty <3

_ Len: _

np <3

_ Rin voted yes in the poll: len is stupid _ .

_ Len: _

THIS WASN’T IN OUR AGREEMENT

_ Meiko: _

Lol

_ Rin: _

<3

_ Len: _

</3

.

.

**Rin Kagamine**

_ 11:01 _

_ Rin: _

are you still good for today?

_ Len: _

yee

3pm okay?

_ Rin: _

yep

_ Len: _

sweet

_ Rin: _

how’s miku doing? 

_ Len: _

she’s been trying on clothes all morning

and keeps asking me for my opinion

even tho she knows I have no sense of fashion

_ Rin: _

hahahahaha

please make her wear the dumbest outfit she shows you

_ Len: _

omg no

that would be mean

_ Rin: _

I hate that you’re a decent human being

anyway hope you’re ready for chat to blow up tonight

she probably won’t shut up about it for days

_ Len: _

we can laugh over it at dinner

_ Rin: _

sounds like a plan

_ Len: _

;)

_ Rin: _

pls don’t send that emoji unironically ever again

_ Len: _

:(

**Miku Hatsune**

_ 12:13 _

_ Miku: _

len is smiling

_ Rin: _

wow didn’t know he was capable of emotions

_ Miku: _

he’s smiling about his date w u ;)

_ Rin: _

no

it’s not a date

and he’s probably smiling because he’s going to the arcade

_ Miku: _

sure

_ Rin: _

you’re leaving soon, right? what are you wearing?

_ Miku: _

clothes 

_ Rin: _

pics or it didn’t happen

_ Miku: _

fuck

_ Miku Hatsune sent a photo. _

_ Rin: _

oh, that’s cute

let me guess, the boobs are strategically a part of the outfit, right?

_ Miku: _

ofc what do u think I want this date 2 be? a vanilla walk in the park? I want 2 make her wet

_ Rin: _

that’s nice

well good luck with that

_ Miku: _

thnx u bitch

look if i do bring her home can u pls look after len

like

let him stay over yours so he doesn’t hear our kinky sex

its rly awkward

and i dont want 2 have 2 look him in the eye the next morning with him knowing how loud i moan

_ Rin: _

okay well

you have to tell him he has to stay over mine

also you owe me

_ Miku: _

y would i have to owe u 

when im doing u a favour

_ Rin: _

uhhh I think I’m the one doing the favour, but sure

_ Miku: _

ill remind him to grab the condoms

_ Rin: _

you make me want to kermit suicide

**The Three Musketeers™**

_ 12:27 _

_ len’s an idiot: _

hey @Len Kagamine

_ shithead: _

yes

_ len’s an idiot: _

don’t forget ur condoms

_ shithead: _

what

why

_ len’s biggest fan: _

miku

_ len’s an idiot: _

for tonight

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

_ shithead: _

what’s tonight?

_ len’s biggest fan: _

miku plans to have really loud sex with her date

she doesn’t want you to hear her orgasm

_ shithead: _

bold of you all to assume I haven’t heard her orgasm

_ len’s an idiot: _

what

_ len’s biggest fan: _

what

_ shithead: _

maybe masturbate in the shower when I’m not home, miku

if you don’t want me hearing that

_ len’s biggest fan: _

OH MY GOD

LOL

**Miku Hatsune**

_ 12:34 _

_ Miku: _

fuck my life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_ Rin: _

that’s karma

_ Miku: _

shut up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**The Three Musketeers™**

_ 12:36 _

_ len’s biggest fan changed len’s an idiot’s nickname to Masturbator Miku. _

_ Masturbator Miku: _

ur so lucky ur in chiba so i cant kill u!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_ len’s biggest fan: _

<3 

love you too, sweatie

.

.

**Len Kagamine**

_ 14:14 _

_ Len: _

I’m omw

_ Rin: _

Okay! Same!

Might be a few mins late though

There are some delays

_ Len: _

it’s cool

also I packed a bag with extra clothes

just in case I do have to stay over

bc of miku

I hope that’s okay with you?

_ Rin: _

It’s fine. Miku already told me about it.

I hope you don’t mind sleeping on the floor as usual, though.

_ Len: _

I don’t mind.

_ Rin: _

Thanks. You’re an angel.

I’m glad you don’t complain like Miku.

_ Len: _

nah. I get the struggle of tiny apartments

speaking of miku, why did she mention me needing condoms for tonight

_ Rin: _

Oh God

Who knows

_ Len: _

idk what she had on her mind but I don’t want to think about it

_ Rin: _

Lol same

_ Len: _

anyway, see you soon! have a safe trip

:3

_ Rin: _

Thanks, you too

**Rin Kagamine**

_ 14:32 _

_ Rin Kagamine sent a photo. _

_ Rin: _

He sent me a fucking three-face.

_ 15:46 _

_ Miku: _

LOL

have fun w ur furry bf

.

.

**Len Kagamine**

_ 18:17 _

_ Len: _

how’s your date going?

_ Miku: _

swell. gumi is a goddess, i want 2 motorboat her tiddies

_ Len: _

that’s nice. 

rin agrees

_ Miku: _

how’s ur date going?

_ Len: _

um

‘date’

?

_ Miku: _

yes u heathen.

date

_ Len: _

uh, well

rin and I are eating 

we played a lot of rhythm games

rin also won a huge gudetama toy from a claw machine

_ Miku: _

was she cute when she won the toy?

_ Len: _

what 

_ Miku: _

was she cute. like. did she do her cute little victory dance when she won the toy??

_ Len: _

… sure? why do you call it cute

_ Miku: _

bc it’s fucking cute. what’s wrong with u. do u think rin is not cute?

_ Len: _

what?

no?

ofc not

rin is cute

I just don’t understand the emphasis on her victory dance

she always does it

and it’s always cute

like aren’t we under general consensus rin is always cute?

_ Miku: _

hmm

ok

dont forget she’s cute

_ Len: _

are you in love with rin or something?

_ Miku: _

wtf????

you straight people are weird

_ Len: _

what’s that supposed to mean???

miku??

miku

don’t ignore me

MIKU

**Rin Kagamine**

_ 18:23 _

_ Rin: _

Wtf did you say to len

_ Miku: _

what

y u ask that

_ Rin: _

He’s beet red and refuses to tell me what you texted him

_ Miku Hatsune sent a photo. _

_ Miku: _

here 

_ Rin: _

Oh god no wonder he’s embarrassed

Why did you do that

Is your date boring or something?

_ Miku: _

no, not at all

gumi just went 2 the bathroom and im waiting for her

we made out for half the movie we saw

we’re going 2 get some sushi

then we’ll probably get married or smth idk

_ Rin: _

Wow, wish I could relate

_ Miku: _

rin if u want len 2 pork u just say it

_ Rin: _

I’m going to end this conversation now before it gets out of hand.

Have fun with your date.

Please let us know before 9pm whether you want Len to return or not

_ Miku: _

ugh u suck

**Len Kagamine**

_ 20:48 _

_ Len: _

hey uh miku rin and I just want to know what the go is

just bc it’s getting late and I don’t want rin going home by herself really late

it’d be cool if you could let us know

sometime 

please

_ 21:01 _

_ Len: _

hey miku are you okay?

gumi didn’t turn out to be an axe murderer did she?

text us if you’re still alive

also if you want me home or not

_ 21:53 _

_ Len: _

okay uh I’m heading over to rin’s place since we haven’t heard back from you

if you don’t respond by tomorrow morning we’re probably going to go to the police

it’d be cool if you could answer so we know you’re okay

_ 00:12 _

_ Miku: _

OMFG IM SO SORRY

I LOST TRACK OF THE TIME

GUMI AND I WENT TO A LOVE HOTEL 2 FUCK SINCE SHE LIVES REALLY FAR AWAY FROM KANAGAWA AND DIDN’T WANT 2 COMMUTE THAT FAR HOME THE NEXT DAY

I GOT 2 MOTORBOAT HER TIDDIES

ILL MESSAGE THE MAIN CHAT TOMORROW WITH ALL THE DEETS SO U GUYS CAN LEARN FROM THE BEST AND MAYBE PUT THEM IN2 PRACTICE IDK

<3

IM SOHORNY

_ Len: _

miku... why the fuck

**Miku Hatsune**

_ 00:16 _

_ Miku: _

have u and len fucked yet???

_ Rin: _

what the fuck. no.

_ Miku: _

oh my god y r u guys awkae then

_ Rin: _

um because we’ve been waiting up to see if you’re still alive??? like hello???? thanks for not texting us

_ Miku: _

even gumi agrees u 2 should just fuck

_ Rin: _

miku ffs

stop sending me shit like this

len is getting suspicious as to why im not telling him what you’re saying.

_ Miku: _

tell him boht gumi and i want u 2 2 fuck

:)

_ Rin: _

yikes

goodnight

_ Miku: _

u want his big

long

virgin

schlong

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

.

.

**HS Music Class**

_ 03:57 _

_ Meiko: _

I LVOE ALL OF YUO GYSY!!!!!!!!! <333333323333

I MSIS YOU LAL LETS HAGN OUT SOEMTIME

MIKI I HOPE YUOR DATE WENT EWLL

<<#3,33

LVOE, MIEKO

_ 06:59 _

_ Len: _

holy fuck

_ Rin: _

omg you weren’t kidding…

_ 10:25 _

_ Kaito: _

Aw Meiko! I love you too!! :DDD

_ 12:11 _

_ Luka: _

Len, you get one warning.

_ Len: _

shit

wait no

_ Luka Megurine removed Len Kagamine from the chat _ .

_ Rin: _

HA!

.

.

**The Three Musketeers™**

_ 13:45 _

_ Masturbator Miku: _

OH MY GODDDDDD

len i think ur going 2 have 2 stay at rins for a few weeks

im going 2 be horny forever

im sorry

_ shithead: _

very funny, miku, but I can just wear earplugs

or maybe you could, like, idk, keep down the volume?

_ len’s biggest fan: _

yeah, no

my room is the size of a refrigerator 

I don’t think len enjoys sleeping on my cramped floor very much

also I agree with him

maybe you should learn to keep it down?

I had to when I was living in the same room as my aunt for a month

_ shithead: _

wait. 

you masturbate?

_ Masturbator Miku: _

omg len of course she masturbates

rin radiates horny bitch energy

that aside,

y the fuck were u masturbating in the same room AS UR AUNT????

_ len’s biggest fan: _

look I took too long when I did it in the bathroom so my mum was getting suspicious

so of course I did it in bed

I only did it once when my aunt was there

anyway I was like 15. I was a teenager who had no logic

_ Masturbator Miku: _

ew

but ok

I guess I could let it slide

_ len’s biggest fan: _

thanks, motorboater miku

_ Masturbator Miku changed her nickname to motorboater miku. _

_ len’s biggest fan: _

that’s plagiarism

_ motorboater miku: _

idc

len has gone suspiciously quiet

_ shithead: _

I’m still here

_ motorboater miku: _

hey @Len Kagamine

_ shithead: _

what??

_ motorboater miku: _

RIN MASTURBATES

_ len’s biggest fan: _

oh my god

_ shithead: _

yeah okay that’s nice

_ motorboater miku: _

it’s nice ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) huh

_ len’s biggest fan: _

I’m going to go throw myself off my balcony

bye guys!

_ motorboater miku: _

oh no len better go rescue her

_ shithead: _

what. why me

_ motorboater miku: _

are you not at her place still??

_ shithead: _

no? I went home this morning. 

why else would we have been awake at 7am

_ motorboater miku: _

omg u 2 r so boring. im still with gumi at the love hotel

we’ve fucked like 12 times

_ shithead: _

can’t see how that’s comparable… but okay

have fun miku

_ motorboater miku: _

BOTH OF U NEED SEX IN UR LIVES!!!!!

SO FRIGID!!!!!

**Rin Kagamine**

_ 15:32 _

_ Rin: _

I’m sorry about how weird chat got

_ Len: _

huh

oh

nah

that was just miku

_ Rin: _

well

okay

seriously though, do you think girls don’t masturbate or something??

_ Len: _

um

it’s not that I don’t think girls masturbate…

uh

this is awkward

I just never thought about you masturbating

not that I’m thinking about that now either

you just don’t seem like the person to… masturbate

_ Rin: _

okay

cool

well I guess I’m glad you think that

wait idk if I should be glad about that

yikes

_ Len: _

I mean

I didn’t mean it in a bad way?

tbh I don’t know why I was so shocked about it

I guess it’s bc miku’s very open about her sexuality but you’re not

so I never really thought about it

_ Rin: _

yeah

I guess that makes sense

_ Len: _

sorry for being stupid

_ Rin: _

it’s okay, len

sorry for coming at you with a weird conversation

_ Len: _

nah it’s cool

we have weird conversations every day

:^)

_ Rin: _

lol

you’re sweet

_ Len: _

only for you ;)

we should go to the arcade again sometime though

I had fun

_ Rin: _

me too!

thanks for helping me win the gudetama too <3

I’ll let you know when I’m free next with work

_ Len: _

that’d be great!

have a nice afternoon, rin :)

**Rin Kagamine**

_ 15:53 _

_ Rin Kagamine sent a photo. _

_ Rin: _

I sent him a heart and he sent me a smiley face back

you’re ruining this friendship, miku


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gumi gets dragged into the chaos, Miku is devastated the ship crashes and burns, and Rin's life goes to hell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a reminder:  
> motorboater miku/i love gumi - Miku  
> shithead/i love rin/I hate miku too - Len  
> len's biggest fan/i love len/I hate miku - Rin  
> i love miku - Gumi
> 
> Also I bullshitted Gumi's name for the sake of this fic, haha.

**The Three Musketeers™**

_02:49_

_motorboater miku:_

ok so guess who’s single

_shithead:_

uh

you?

_motorboater miku:_

no

guess again

_shithead:_

??????

_motorboater miku:_

i forgot ur stupid

anyway

it’s

u and rin

bc THIS BITCH GOT A GF!!!!!!!!!!!!

_shithead:_

oh

cool

_motorboater miku:_

y r u not excited???????

_shithead:_

idk like maybe it’s because she’s all you’ve been talking about and I kind of already called it?

or do people fuck more than 12 times and still not get into a relationship?

_motorboater miku:_

wow u naive lil thing

of course ppl fuck 12 times and not get in2 a relationship

it’s called fwb

maybe u n rin should try it sometime

_shithead:_

uh

what??

_motorboater miku:_

friends w benefits, len

u 2 should try it

w each other

since u cant seem 2 handle the concept of dating

_shithead:_

why would rin and I fuck 12 times and not establish some sort of relationship

that sounds horrible

_motorboater miku:_

um FRIENDS IS A KIND OF RELATIONSHIP????

_shithead:_

friends don’t fuck 12 times tho?????

_motorboater miku:_

OMG PEOPLE CAN LITERALLY DRINK EACH OTHERS PISS N STILL BE FRIENDS

_shithead:_

NO ONE IS DRINKING ANYONE’S PISS, THANK YOU

_motorboater miku:_

i never mentioned anything about u 2 having 2 drink piss!!!!!!

unless thats ur thing len

or

rins thing

_len’s biggest fan removed motorboater miku from the chat._

_len’s biggest fan:_

No

3am

Stop message

I sleep

Bed now len

_shithead:_

oh

sorry rin

goodnight

**Miku Hatsune**

_03:08_

_Miku:_

anyway so as i was sayign

u 2 should fuck

_Len:_

miku I don’t appreciate your unhealthy concepts of a relationship

rin and I are just good friends

we’re not looking to fuck

and I’m sure she feels super uncomfortable about this conversation

jeez

_Miku:_

and denial isn’t a river in egypt

_Len:_

what

_Miku:_

what

_Len:_

it’s late

I’m going to bed

goodnight miku

_Miku:_

ugh fine

gn u virgin mary

.

.

**The Three Musketeers™**

_06:24_

_len’s biggest fan:_

congrats on your gf miku

oh wait

_len’s biggest fan added Miku Hatsune to the chat._

_len’s biggest fan:_

congrats on your gf miku

we all knew it was going to happen tho

_09:43_

_shithead:_

lol

_12:13_

_Miku:_

THANKS BITCH

_Miku Hatsune added Megumi Fukuzawa to the chat._

_Miku Hatsune changed the chat name to The Four Musketeers™._

_Miku Hatsune changed len’s biggest fan’s name to i love len._

_Miku Hatsune changed shithead’s name to i love rin._

_Miku Hatsune changed her name to i love gumi._

_i love gumi changed Megumi’s name to i love miku._

_i love gumi:_

yes. much better

_i love miku:_

Miku, what is this

_i love rin:_

miku

miku

miku

miku

_i love gumi:_

what is it my sweet little len pie

_i love rin:_

why

_17:21_

_i love len:_

What

For fuck’s sake

Miku

_i love len changed her name to I hate miku._

_I hate miku:_

I just want one day

Just one day

When you’re not doing weird shit in this chat

_i love rin changed his name to I hate miku too._

_I hate miku too:_

we revolt

_i love gumi:_

u 2 r MEAN!!!!!!!

:(

see what i mean guimi

gumi

they bully me

_i love miku:_

TBH I don’t blame them

_i love gumi:_

NOT YOU TOO

_I hate miku:_

We revolt

_I hate miku changed the chat’s name to Miku Hatsune Sucks._

_i love gumi:_

THIS IS SO UNFAIR

.

.

**Miku Hatsune**

_11:09_

_Miku:_

do u want the good news or the bad news

_Rin:_

What

Isn’t it always bad news coming from you

_Miku:_

um

no

go fuck urself

anyway

ill tell u the bad news first

len has a gf

_Rin:_

Oh

Good for him

_Miku Hatsune sent a photo._

_Miku:_

IM NOT LYING BITCH

THEYRE SITTING ON THE COUCH!!!!

TOGETHER!!!!!

HOLDING HANDS!!!!!!!

AND WATCHING NETFLIX!!!!!!!!!!!

U KNO WHAT THAT MEANS RITE

_Rin:_

Uh

Remind him his condoms are in the top drawer?

_Miku:_

FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

look rin

im sorry

i rly tried

i did

len is just stupid

pls don’t cry

_Rin:_

I

I’m not crying?

_Miku:_

pics or u lie

_Rin Kagamine sent a photo._

_Miku:_

wtf where r u

_Rin:_

I’m in shinjuku

_Miku:_

y?????????

_Rin:_

It’s a secret.

_Miku:_

wtf

r u getting involved in the sex industry or smth

WELL ANYWAY

LEN HAS A GF

AND IT ISNT U!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

what do i do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

what do WE do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_Rin:_

Nothing??

I already knew he was seeing a girl.

She’s from one of his courses at uni and they study together

And he wanted to ask her out

So I told him to do it

They went out last Saturday.

Didn’t you know?

_Miku:_

WHAT!!!!!!!!!!

NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i thought he went out w u

at least that was what i thought he said

_Rin:_

Oh my god.

_Miku:_

I REFUSE TO ACCEPT THIS!!!!!!!

also i cant believe he told u all this n not ME!!!!

AND he told u all this even tho U LIKE HIM!!!!!!!!!

I THOUGHT HE KNEW U DID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HE’S RLY THAT FUCKING OBLIVIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!

_Rin:_

Miku

Calm down

_Miku:_

NO!!!!!!!!!!! I FEEL SO BAD FOR U!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WE’VE BEEN TRYING SO LONG TO GET HIM W U!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

EVEN MEIKO AND LUKA WERE VOUCHING FOR U

EVEN GUMI

:((((((((((

_Rin:_

Miku, it’s fine

I accepted my fate in high school

Len’s always been oblivious

Besides, I’m enjoying my time as a single pringle

Please respect that

_Miku:_

im so sorry

u must feel so shit rn

if its any consolation

the good news was that

the girl he’s dating is uglier than u

so it’s obvious he must think ur out of his league or smth

_Rin:_

That’s mean

I’ve seen photos of her and she’s definitely not uglier than me.

Anyway I gtg

I’ll talk later

_Miku:_

RIN PLS DONT HURT URSELF

I LOVE U STILL!!!!!!!!!

NOT AS MUCH AS GUMI BUT ILY

<3333333

**Miku Hatsune**

_12:35_

_Miku:_

look i kno ur probs getting a bj rn

but look at this

_Miku Hatsune sent a photo._

_Miku:_

RIN IS HEARTBROKEN

SHE’S RESORTED 2 WORKING IN THE SEX INDUSTRY NOW

2 DEAL WITH HER HEARTBREAK

HOW COULD U

U MONSTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Len Kagamine**

_13:02_

_Len:_

rin, what does miku mean by this

_Len Kagamine sent a photo._

_13:45_

_Rin:_

Oh my god

Just ignore her

I had to go to Shinjuku today for work.

_Len:_

okay

_Rin:_

Sorry

_Len:_

it’s fine

_Rin:_

I hope your day with SeeU has been going well?

_Len:_

oh

let me guess

miku told you?

_Rin:_

What doesn’t she tell me?

_Len:_

lol

yeah it’s been okay :)

she wants to hang out on saturday

did you want to join?

you could bring along a friend

if being alone with us makes you feel weird

_Rin:_

I would love to, but I have work on saturday.

Sorry

I’m glad it’s been going well though!

_Len:_

that’s a pity. you don’t usually work saturdays, do you?

and yeah, I’m glad as well.

thank you again for convincing me to do it

_Rin:_

Oh yeah I don’t usually. But they asked me to cover for someone.

And it’s fine, you don’t need to keep thanking me.

_Len:_

that sucks. maybe next time!

I’m indebted to you though

I have to keep thanking you for as long as the relationship lasts

lol

_Rin:_

Yeah, maybe

Haha.

I have to go.

Talk later.

_Len:_

oh

okay

have a nice afternoon!!

.

.

**OMG guys there’s something wrong with ri**

_16:28_

_Miku Hatsune added Luka Megurine, Meiko Sakine and Megumi Fukuzawa to the chat._

_Miku:_

I HAVE RLY BAD NEWS, FOLKS

_Luka:_

What is it?

_Meiko:_

Is this about Len getting a girlfriend?

_Miku:_

HOW DID U KNO

_Meiko:_

Rin told me about it the other day.

_Miku:_

SHE TOLD U?????

BUT SHE DIDNT TELL ME??????

oh boy this is worse than i thought

_Megumi:_

What’s going on?

_Miku:_

GYMI

GUMI

!!!!!!!!!!!

LEN GOT A GF

AND RIN IS DEFINITELY 100% NOT COOL W IT

BUT SHE WONT ADMIT IT

LIKE SHES BEING RLY WEIRD

EVEN LEN MENTIONED SHE SOUNDED KINDA WEIRD 2 ME TODAY

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_Luka:_

Maybe we should give her some time to herself?

She could just be going through a rough patch

_Miku:_

BUT ISNT THAT 2 COINCIDENTAL?????

_Meiko:_

Okay

So

Don’t tell Rin I told you guys this

But she called me the other day in tears

_Miku:_

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_Meiko:_

She didn’t really tell me the full gist of it but there are some family problems going on.

And she’s really unhappy with work.

And the Len thing was the icing to the cake, but her weirdness isn’t exclusively because of him, so. Don’t jump to conclusions.

_Miku:_

HOW COME SHE TELLS U ALL THIS STUFF BUT SHE DOESNT TELL ME????

I THOUGHT WE WERE CLOSE

:((

_Luka:_

Miku, no one tells you anything because you’re insensitive and insufferable.

_Miku:_

gumi what do those big words mean

_Megumi:_

She said you’re not a good person to confide in.

_Miku:_

THAT’S NOT TRUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_Megumi:_

TBH I wouldn’t confide in you either

_Miku:_

GUMIq!!!!!!!!!!!

_Meiko:_

Anyway so now that I’ve told you that can you please calm down a little and not plot to skin Len?

Also don’t tell Rin either.

And don’t be weird around her.

Just treat her normally.

She just needs support from her friends right now.

**Miku Hatsune**

_16:41_

_Miku:_

RIN I LOVE U SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

U CAN TELL ME ANYTHING U KNO THAT RITE?????????

IM HERE FOR U

I LOVE U

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Luka Megurine**

_16:43_

_Luka:_

Hey Rin, I know we don’t talk much

But I was just wondering if you’d like to come over mine for dinner sometime?

I was thinking of inviting a few others, just having a nice dinner.

Anyway just let me know when you’re free.

**Megumi Fukuzawa**

_16:44_

_Megumi:_

Hi Rin!

This is Gumi, Miku’s girlfriend.

I heard you like arcade games

I was thinking, Miku, you and I could do a girl’s night out in Akihabara and go arcade hopping, or something!

Maybe Saturday night?

If you’re down for it just hmu and we can organise it. :)

Sorry for messaging randomly!

.

.

**Rin Kagamine**

_17:59_

_Rin:_

Hey Meiko

Care to explain why my phone is exploding with messages from everyone being really nice to me?

_Meiko:_

Oh.

**OMG guys there’s something wrong with ri**

_18:04_

_Meiko:_

I asked you guys not to do something.

And yet

You did it anyway.

_Miku:_

what

idk what ur talking abt meiko

??

**Meiko Sakine**

_18:07_

_Meiko:_

I’m sorry.

It’s better I just show you, instead of trying to explain.

**OMG guys there’s something wrong with ri**

_18:09_

_Meiko Sakine added Rin Kagamine to the chat._

_Rin:_

Oh boy

.

.

**Miku Hatsune Sucks**

_23:56_

_I hate miku too:_

hey guys, can I add seeu to the chat?

_i love gumi:_

no

there is no such thing as the five musketeers

_I hate miku too:_

there’s no such thing as the four musketeers either, though

_i love gumi:_

ur right

_i love gumi removed I hate miku too from the chat._

_i love miku:_

Oh

_I hate miku:_

has he come crying yet?

_i love gumi:_

surprisingly, no

**Len Kagamine**

_00:05_

_Len:_

hey rin, can you add me back to chat please?

_Rin:_

um

hold on

**Miku Hatsune Sucks**

_00:06_

_I hate miku:_

he wants me to add him back

_i love gumi:_

no

gumi also says no

right gumi?

_i love miku:_

Yes

I mean no

I mean you can’t add him back

**Len Kagamine**

_00:09_

_Rin Kagamine sent a photo._

_Rin:_

the verdict is in

I’m sorry, len

_Len:_

since when did you take miku’s side??

_Rin:_

sorry :(

_Len:_

:((

**Miku Hatsune**

_00:13_

_Miku:_

y r u bothering rin but aren’t bothering ME

_Len:_

because she’s usually NICE

_Miku:_

no she isnt

omg

_Len:_

yes she is!!!

you’ve corrupted her

you’ve stolen her away

I can’t believe you’ve done this

_Miku:_

u only played urself len kagameine!!!

its ur loss

rin is a fragile baby

she needs 2 b nurtured

n u been too busy rubbing ur dick on seeu

smh

its not my fault she’s moved on and joined my team

git gud

_Len:_

?????

fine

I’ll make my own group chat

with rin and seeu

and I’ll call it the three musketeers

and I’ll take her back

_Miku:_

rin doesn’t want 2 b in ur stupid group chat

dont b so cruel and make her third wheel

ew

_Len:_

its not third wheeling??!!

**Miku Hatsune Sucks**

_00:17_

_i love gumi sent a photo._

_i love gumi:_

good luck

_I hate miku:_

I could not think of anything more awful than having to be in TWO group chats where I’m the third wheel to a couple

kms

_i love gumi:_

excuse me but we lov u just as much u r no third wheel in our lesbian eyes

_i love miku:_

*Bisexual

_i love gumi:_

sorry gumi

our lesbian and bisexual eyes

**The Three Musketeers™**

_00:20_

_Len Kagamine added SeeU Ryeo and Rin Kagamine to the chat._

_Len:_

hey guys

_Rin Kagamine left the chat._

_Len:_

oh.

**Miku Hatsune Sucks**

_00:21_

_I hate miku changed the chat’s name to Len Really Sucks._

_i love gumi:_

i love it when our girl finally stands up 4 herself

SCREW BOYS RIN!!!!

SCREW THEM!!!!

YOU DESERVE BETTER!!!!!!!

_i love miku:_

Yeah!!

Boys suck!!!

That’s why I’m dating Miku

_i love gumi:_

FINALLY A MAN OF CULTURE!!!!!!!!!!!

_I hate miku:_

please stop

or I’ll leave this chat too

_i love gumi:_

NO

I LOV U RIN!!!!!!!!!

_i love miku:_

I’ve never met you IRL before but I love you too Rin!!

_i love gumi changed her name to i love rin and gumi._

_i love rin and gumi changed i love miku’s name to i love rin and miku._

_i love rin and gumi changed I hate miku’s name to i love myself._

_i love rin and gumi changed the chat’s name to rin kagamine appreciation chat._

_i love rin and gumi:_

do u feel the love now bb

_i love myself:_

yes

_i love rin and miku:_

Now I’m feeling a little jealous

.

.

**Miku Hatsune**

_14:56_

_Miku:_

are u still all good 2 meet up 2nite?

_Rin:_

Yeah. I think so.

_Miku:_

n u cool w gumi tagging along, rite?

_Rin:_

Yeah. I haven’t met her yet anyway so

_Miku:_

ok :))

just checkin

btw

did u kno len was going out w seeu 2nite 2??

_Rin:_

Oh, right.

He asked me if I wanted to come out with them today

And I told him I was working

Lol

_Miku:_

o

o no…

_Rin:_

What does that mean…

_Miku:_

nothing :)

see u 2nite :))))

_Rin:_

Miku

???

What did you do???

**Len Kagamine**

_15:03_

_Len:_

hey rin

I get that it’s really awkward for you but

if you didn’t want to go out seeu and I you could’ve just told me

_Rin:_

What

Why are you saying this

_Len:_

miku told me you guys were going out tonight

_Rin:_

Oh.

Right.

Yeah

We are

But I do actually have work

And when you asked me if I wanted to hang with you guys I assumed you meant during the day??

When I was working

Sorry

_Len:_

okay

you’re not lying because you don’t want to seem rude

are you?

you can be honest with me

you know

_Rin:_

I’m not lying

I promise

I would send a picture to prove but the only way I’m messaging you rn is because I’m shitting on the toilet

So

_Len:_

ew

okay

I believe you

but you know you can be honest with me right???

it’d be nice if you could meet seeu though

I’m sure you’d get along well :)

_Rin:_

Yeah!

Of course

Let’s try for next time

Sorry for the misunderstanding

_Len:_

it’s cool :)

good luck with the rest of your shift

_Rin:_

Thanks

**Rin Kagamine**

_15:12_

_Rin:_

Miku

I’m not helping you win things from the crane machines tonight

_Miku:_

IM SORRY

I DIDNT REALISE

IT JUST CAME OUT

R U ACTUALLY WORKING THO??

_Rin:_

Yes and no

I can’t talk about it rn

Anyway I should go I’ve been in the toilet for 20 mins people are going to think I died lol

_Miku:_

????

Y R U SO DAMN MYSTERIOUS NOWADAYS

.

.

**rin kagamine appreciation chat**

_18:36_

_i love myself:_

Okay I’m omw I’m so sorry I’m late

_i love rin and miku:_

Don’t worry!! Take your time

I’m not even at the station yet. :)

Miku isn’t either

_i love rin and gumi:_

RIN R U A SEX WORKER??

PLS ANSWER HONESTLY

_i love myself:_

No!!!!

I don’t know where you’re getting that idea from miku

What I’m doing is far from sex work???

_i love rin and gumi:_

ok but

convenience stores don’t just make u go 2 shinjuku in the middle of the day like

wtf

_i love myself:_

I have two jobs

Convenience store

And

Other job

I can’t talk about it atm

But when I CAN I will talk about it

It’s nothing to do with the sex industry

I PROMISE

_i love rin and gumi:_

im concERNED!!!

but sex worker or not i support u

just b careful :((

_i love myself:_

Thanks miku

But again

Not a sex worker

_i love rin and miku:_

It’s okay, Rin

I believe you.

For now you are a convenience store assistant by day, and superhero by night

Thank you for saving Paris

_i love rin and gumi:_

wtf

_i love myself:_

A superhero sounds way cooler

Thanks, gumi

_i love rin and miku:_

It’s no worries <3

See you soon!

_i love rin and gumi:_

UM EXCUSE ME U NEVER SEND ME HEARTS

_i love rin and miku:_

Rin is pure and worthy of hearts

_i love rin and gumi:_

</3

i cant believe u love rin more than me

_i love rin and miku:_

This is the Rin appreciation chat

Of course I do

_i love rin and gumi:_

im crying on the yamanote line rn

_i love myself:_

Wow, mood

_i love rin and gumi:_

oof

.

.

**Miku Hatsune**

_19:01_

_Miku:_

ok so

do u want the good news or the bad news

_Rin:_

This conversation starter seems familiar

_Miku:_

the bad news is len and seeu are at akiba

and we ran into them trying to avoid them

and now

its a couplesfest

im sorry but

ur gonna be fifth wheeling

unless u wanna join gumi and i in a poly relationship?

_Rin:_

Okay I’m getting off this train and going home lol

_Miku:_

NO

THE GOOD NEWS IS THAT

UR STILL PRETTIER THAN SEEU!!!!!!!

You really are prettier than SeeU

Like if I had to make out with one of you, I would choose you.

She’s too tall for Len, too - Gumi

SEE????

GUMI AGREES!!!!!!!!!!!

_Rin:_

Oh my god

Beauty isn’t everything

I’m still going home

_Miku:_

OK WE’LL DITCH THEM!!!!

GUMI N I R RUNNING AWAY

LOOK!!!!

_Miku Hatsune sent a video._

_Rin:_

Wow

You guys really are

_Miku:_

O NO THEY CHASING AFTER US

ELN IS FAST!!!!!!!1111111111111

FUCK!!!!!

THEY THINK ITS A GAME OF TAG>????

IN THE MIDDLE OF AKIBA

GOD THEY RLY R 2 DUMB 4 EACH OTHER

WE NEED SOME RIN WISDOM

_Rin:_

What the fuck

Okay well I’m already on the train home, so

_Miku:_

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPOIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

rin pls

**rin kagamine appreciation chat**

_19:14_

_i love rin and gumi:_

rin pls

_i love rin and miku:_

Rin please

_i love rin and gumi:_

rin pls

_i love rin and miku:_

Rin please

_i love rin and gumi:_

rin pls

_i love rin and miku:_

Rin please

_i love rin and gumi:_

rin pls

_i love myself:_

OH MY GOD SHUT UP

_i love rin and gumi:_

NO

U BETRAYED US

WE WONT STOP

**OMG guys there’s something wrong with ri**

_19:18_

_Miku:_

rin pls

_Megumi:_

Rin please

_Meiko:_

????

_Miku:_

rin pls

meiko join

_Meiko:_

Okay

Why

_Megumi:_

Rin please

_Miku:_

she ran away

rin pls

_Meiko:_

She ran away??

Seriously??

Where??

Is she okay??

_Miku:_

DONT KNO

RIM P;S

_Meiko:_

Rin please!!!

_Megumi:_

Rin please

_Miku:_

rin pls

_Luka:_

Rin please?

_Miku:_

RIM PLS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_Rin:_

MY NAME ISN’T RIM

_Miku:_

RIN PLS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Meiko Sakine**

_19:20_

_Meiko:_

Rin

Are you alright?

Do you need help?

Why did you run away?

_Rin:_

Oh my god

I’m fine

Miku is lying

I didn’t run away from anything or anyone

I’m just going home lol

I cancelled plans with her because I didn’t want to be a fifth wheel

That’s all

She’s just being dramatic

_Meiko:_

Oh okay

So you’re really fine?

You know you can come bother me or Luka anytime you like you know

We’re here for you

_Rin:_

Yeah, I’m okay

Honestly

Thank you though

I appreciate the concern.

_Meiko:_

Anytime, Rin

<3

**HS Music Class**

_19:25_

_Miku:_

rin pls

rin pls

rin pls

_Meiko:_

Miku, stop

_Kaito:_

Hello what is going on? :)

_Miku:_

RIN GONE

_Kaito:_

What are you talking about?

She’s in this chat :)

_Miku:_

rin pls

_Len:_

what’s wrong with rin??

_Meiko:_

Nothing is wrong with her, Len.

_Miku:_

rin pls

_Meiko:_

Where is Luka when we need her?

_Len:_

oh

miku where did you and gumi go

we can’t find you

I thought we were gonna go to the love live cafe :(

_Kaito:_

What’s a love live?

_Rin:_

When did len get added back in here

_Miku:_

RIN PLS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_Luka:_

Miku, say it again and I’m kicking you from the chat.

_Miku:_

RIN PLS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_Luka Megurine removed Miku Hatsune from the chat._

_Len:_

kaito added me in last week

didn’t you notice?

_Rin:_

No

_Len:_

oh

_Kaito:_

What’s a love live????? D:

_Rin:_

It’s an incest hentai show you dolt

_Len:_

NO

_Kaito:_

Omg!!

I love incest hentai!!! :D

_Luka Megurine removed Kaito Shion from the chat._

_Meiko:_

I wish I could say he was being sarcastic, but we all know Kaito too well to know he can’t use sarcasm.

_Rin:_

It’s always the quiet ones.

_Luka:_

Okay

If someone sends another message to this chat tonight, I’m deleting it.

So shut the fuck up.

**Miku Hatsune**

_19:36_

_Miku:_

hey rin gumi n i r comin 2 ur house so i hope ur spare bed is made n ready

cus we r not leaving

until tmrw

_Rin:_

Okay

Well

Kaito admitted to liking incest hentai in the music class chat

I thought you should know

_Miku:_

i cant believe i thought i had a crush on him in junior high

i revoke all of that

_Rin:_

I think we’ve all crushed on him before we realised his good looks did not reflect his personality

Also you two aren’t allowed to have ANY sex in my apartment

NO SEX

NONE

That’s my only condition

Although I really didn’t want visitors tonight

_Miku:_

o what, were u gonna masturbate rly loud or smth

_Rin:_

Nah

I’m still going to masturbate

_Miku:_

YET U SAID NO SEX!!!!!!!!!!!

_Rin:_

It’s my place

My rules

:)

_Miku:_

that smiley is menacing pls don’t

_Rin:_

:)

_Miku:_

my tiddie r tremblin!!!!!!!

_Rin:_

No sex

And that’s that

If I hear a moan. A SINGULAR MOAN

Both of you are getting kicked outside

And you can sleep in the cold lol

_Miku:_

un

understandable!!!! have a nice day!!!!

**Len Kagamine**

_19:54_

_Len:_

hey miku

are you and gumi still in akiba?

_Miku:_

no

we left like

10 min ago

soz

_Len:_

oh

okay

well you could’ve said something

_Miku:_

SOWWY IT WAS EMERGENCY!!!!

_Len:_

………okay

uh also

can you add me back to the musketeer chat?

please? :(

_Miku:_

request has been filed

will get back 2 u in

1227 bsns days

_Len:_

miku!!!!!!!!!!! :((((

**rin kagamine appreciation chat**

_20:08_

_i love rin and gumi:_

haha ok so get a load of this

len wants back in

_i love rin and miku:_

Poor guy

_i love rin and gumi:_

NO

WE SHOW NO PITY FOR THAT

TRAITOR

_i love myself:_

Hmm.

_i love rin and gumi:_

what does that mean

_i love myself:_

I’m considering…

Hold on.

_i love myself changed the chat’s name to Len hate club._

_i love myself changed her name to Len sucks._

_Len sucks changed i love rin and gumi’s name to Len sucks._

_Len sucks changed i love rin and miku’s name to Len sucks._

_Len sucks:_

Okay

Add him in.

_Len sucks:_

omg

_Len sucks added Len Kagamine to the chat._

_Len sucks:_

Welcome to our cult.

_Len:_

what the fuck

_Len sucks:_

weve been waiting 4 u mister len

_Len sucks:_

Naughty boys come here to be punished.

_Len:_

I… take it back.

_Len Kagamine has left the chat._

_Len sucks:_

haha. gottem

_Len sucks changed her name to Rinnie._

_Rinnie changed Len sucks’s name to Meekeuw._

_Rinnie changed Len sucks’s name to Gummy._

_Rinnie:_

I’m keeping the chat name.

_Meekeuw:_

why do i get an ugly name

_Gummy:_

TBH that’s exactly what I think in my mind while I’m saying your name.

_Meekeuw:_

i am so close 2 breaking up w u

u r lucky u have nice tiddies

_Rinnie:_

Oh my god same gumi

We’re practically soul mates

_Meekeuw:_

stop it u 2

_Gummy:_

IKR?! I can’t believe we have so much in common.

_Meekeuw:_

I SAID STOP IT OR IM ADDING LEN BACK 2 CHAT

_Rinnie:_

Okay man you don’t have to stoop that low

Jeez

_Meekeuw:_

i have a weapon n im not afraid 2 use it

_Gummy:_

:(

I don’t like it when my girlfriends fight.

_Meekeuw added Len Kagamine to the chat._

_Rinnie:_

GUMI NO!!!!!!!!!

_Rinnie removed Len Kagamine from the chat._

_Rinnie:_

NO MORE LEN.

NO.

NO MORE.

_Meekeuw:_

ur gonna have 2 face ur fears 1 day rin

_Rinnie:_

Okay well today is not that day.

Anyway I’m almost home

Let me know when you guys arrive at the train station and I’ll pick you up

_Meekeuw:_

wow

what a good wifey

.

.

**Kaito Shion**

_02:48_

_Kaito:_

Hello Len

I was wondering

If you could add me back to the chat :)

_Len:_

um

sure

I’ll do it tomorrow morning

I mean when I wake up today

_Kaito:_

Thanks Len :3

Also

Why aren’t you dating Rin?

_Len:_

what

_Kaito:_

Rin likes you

_Len:_

okay but

no she doesn’t

especially right now

for some reason

_Kaito:_

Hmm.

Okay.

Well.

Everyone has been trying to get you two together because she’s had a really big crush on you since middle school.

If you don’t believe me ask Meiko :3

Also love live isn’t an incest hentai is it? :(

_Len:_

I’m going to bed

goodnight kaito

_Kaito:_

Oh!

Goodnight Len :)

**Len Kagamine**

_02:56_

_Len:_

is it really true rin has a crush on me??

_Rin:_

Why are you asking me this question in third person???????? At 3am?????

_Len:_

OH FUCK

OH

SORRY

GOODNIGHT

**Len Kagamine**

_03:00_

_Len:_

IS IT REALLY TRUE RIN HAS A CRUSH ON ME

_08:21_

_Meiko:_

Oh no

I mean

What?

Who told you that?

_10:07_

_Len:_

UM

KAITO

_Meiko:_

Oh, for the love of

We delete him from chat for a day, and he’s already wreaking havoc.

_Len:_

BUT DOES SHE?????????

IS IT REAL????

MEIKO?????

I KNOW YOU’RE READING MY MESSAGES

WHY AREN’T YOU REPLYING

MEIKO

MEIKO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Meiko Sakine**

_10:16_

_Meiko:_

Rin

I’m so sorry

_Rin:_

he texted you didn’t he

_Meiko:_

Kaito told him

_Rin:_

kaito is lucky he lives in saitama

he is so, so lucky

_Meiko:_

Don’t worry

Luka and I will try to handle it.

And Miku.

_Rin:_

getting miku involved will definitely fuck the situation up more but it’s fine I’m stuck in bed with the flu anyway so I can only sit here and cry

_Meiko:_

Everything will be fine.

Stay calm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tragically forgot some people may not understand Miku's warped speech.  
> I don't care enough to write a footnote with translations though, so please google it if you're confused.  
> Or ask me if google isn't helpful and I'll translate it for you.
> 
> Oh yeah, also Akiba is short for Akihabara. It's not just something I made up for this story lol.


End file.
